ACCEPTING UNCERTAINTY

 

If this is love
then ask no questions
I cannot answer

so disappointment
cannot distract us
from determination.

Accept the uncertainly
of this rocky road
set out before us

so doubt does not
divine disaster
before it dissolves us.

See today as the future
and tomorrow a bonus

least time tests us
with what has yet to be

and teases us with what
we wasted yesterday.

All Words and Photographs by Damien B. Donnelly

Audio version available on Soundcloud:

https://soundcloud.com/damien-donnelly-2/accepting-uncertainly

 

HARD TO SWALLOW

 

I bowed on bended knee
on foreign shores             on silk cushions
where no one knew me
to an invisible deity.

Did you see me?
Did I exist for you?
Did you believe in me?
Did you exist within me truthfully, invisibly?

I bowed on bended knee
into the light that flooded the floor.

They told me once you liked floods,
you liked to send floods,
to send down your floods
I never saw it,             did anyone really see it?

But they told me,
they told me as if to flood me with fear,
a flood to frighten the faithful.

I bowed in that foreign land
as the dragon’s breath drew a veil upon the sky
as if to cover the heavens from curiosity,
from temptation,
funny what rhymes with salvation,
salvation from what,             from whom?

There is faith,
there is belief
and then man names it all religion.

I bowed on bended knee
within that temple             that foreign temple,
it was not my temple,
I don’t build temples,
I have palaces in my head,
private palaces             private places,
filled with my beliefs             private,
flooded with my teared steams             private,
flooded with my fate           private,
my faith is not called any religion.

I bowed on bended knee
where others knelt before me
while others knelt behind me

StrangersWorshipersBelieversFaithful

foolish?

In the invisible             we place our fate
in man             we place our control.

Can you see them?
Can you exist for them?
Can you believe in them?
Do you exist within them honestly, truthfully?

Do you exist             as I exist?

I bent and bowed             I lowered my eyes,
I followed the flock of faithful foreigners
I confess it was just to conform
so as not to confront or be confronted.
I was a sheep following the shepherds
who shuffled around me
who looked at me             unsure,
who wondered to themselves
if they were the sheep and I was the shepherd.
Seriously!

Seriously,
how did I end up there,
bowing on bended knee
feeling too fair and too foreign
in that place             within that facade
behind that face             my own facade

and I asked the light

ContritionConfessionCommunionConfirmation

Is it all a Con?

ConspireContaminateCondemnConfineConform

Connect,
remember,
I remember once…

I wore a white suit
at 8, at communion;
my first communion,
I took the white bread,
they told me it was his body;
white, light and pure.

It stuck to the roof of my mouth.

It was difficult to swallow

            even then.

I bowed on bended knee,
I did what I was told,
I did what they expected of me,

I saw what they told me to see,
this religion they called a community,

            no more.

I bow on bended knee
in my own palace
far from their atrocities.

I bow on bended knee
and the light is so much brighter

the light inside me
the light within.

We can be the light
we can always be the light             alone
with our faith             our fate
without the hate             without the fear
            far from the floods.

All Words and Photographs by Damien B. Donnelly

Photograph taken at a temple in China.

 

THE REALITY OF DREAMS

 

I can move mountains
At night,
In the darkness,
Within the costume of sleep

I can part the seas,
Call the currents,
Will the waves
Beneath the waves of a duvet

I can save the world,
Untie the menace
From the mission
With the hero of my dreams

I can find my voice
Bold and brave,
Protect and save
When I am sound asleep

In the light
I take steps,
Singularly significant,
To wake the dream to the day

 

All words and photos by Damien B. Donnelly

THE ROAD

 

I,
In the face of all
That came before me,
I,
In the hope of all
To be put before me,
I,
Accepting of the many times
I’ve fallen,
I,
Rejoicing in the many times
I’ve risen
See,
The future as an empty canvas
Stretched before me,
See,
Now the wisdom in all the words
Once bestowed me,
See,
The rhyme and reason to the roads
That lead me here,
See,
The distant faces from my past
I still hold dear.

I,
The inquisitor along the winding road
I’ve taken,
I,
A single soul so often foolish
And mistaken,
I,
The poet penning prose
Beneath the silence,
I,
While wearing masks to be let in,
To shun the violence
Remember,
Each and every laughter
Life has brought me,
Remember,
To raise my head to whatever power
Reins above me,
Remember,
The lengths of love
Which others shared,
Remember,
To see the hope,
To keep the faith
And not be scared.

 

THE WOKEN DREAMER

I am the woken dreamer,
Lost from all faith
In the magic.
Finding an impossibility
In the longevity
Of ever after.

Is it really no more than
The stuff and nonsense
Of fairy tales
And children’s dreams,
Not fit at all
For real mens lives
And the in betweens?

I was willing once
To find favour
In the moment
But they have fallen,
So infrequent of late
That I fancy them now
To be the filling of folly,
Frivolous and fortune-less.

There were others once,
One time dreamers
Who once danced their dream
In to mine.

Did we lose each other,
Or was it all but a trick,
Have I spoken too soon,
Or have I woken too quick?

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SAFE IN YOUR HANDS

In the darkest of night, in the deepest of storms,
When all sound is eroded and all sight has elapsed.
When the entity arises with staff in his hand,
The Avenger of life; The Reaper, he stands.

When the world is divided and the soldier’s gun aimed,
As they gaze upon a land full of hatred and rage.
As war creates anger, base food for the weak
And the timid huddle together joined by a fearful streak.

No fear shall I have, no tear shall I cry,
No doubt for the future, no woe shall I sigh.

When ignorance breads hatred through the veins of brothers,
As the cord that binds us is untied and unattached.
When it’s brother against brother, battle of morals,
There can be no winner but forever foolish quarrels.

While the walls hold the cries of frightened little children,
In the heart of each stone lie the blood and the bruises.
The Adult, the Guardian, the Figure in the night
Makes innocent little children feel dirty neath the light.

No fear shall I have, no tear shall I cry,
No doubt for the future, no woe shall I sigh.

When disease engulfs and courage is tested,
The body feels betrayed by the mother, the protector.
As the ravages of decay mean now you walk, not run,
And the foreboding termination means tomorrow may never come.

When no more is there evidence of the strength of nature,
As the walls of destruction fall forth and crush the seed.
As the green of the earth becomes engulfed by doom,
And no more shall we witness the flowers beautiful bloom.

No fear shall I have, no tear shall I cry,
No doubt for the future, no woe shall I sigh.

For you will stand tall with strength in your hand,
Love in your heart and me at your command.
How could I fall into a crevice of decay,
When you stand beside me to bring life to my day.

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